


i called in sick from your funeral

by thecoloursinthegravel



Series: Some Things Were Meant To Be [6]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-31
Updated: 2016-05-31
Packaged: 2018-07-11 10:18:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7044394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecoloursinthegravel/pseuds/thecoloursinthegravel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Like I could pretend I never said it so I could pretend it wasn’t true.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i called in sick from your funeral

I called in sick from your funeral

The sight of your family made me feel responsible

 

I feel-

Fuck’s sake

I can’t really begin

I can’t find the words

I

I’m stuck

I said it before

I said it before so I don’t want to say it again

But

I’m

I’m going to say it

I really-

 

I love you

 

And I’m so, so awfully sorry that I never told you

I said

I said that I said it before

And I did

I said it when you weren’t looking

When you were in another room, another house, another town

I said it in the moments before you opened your eyes in the morning

And in the seconds after you closed them at night

And before you came up for air at the swimming pool

And when you had your music on so loud I could hear it through your headphones

I said it when it felt like saying it didn’t count

Like I could pretend I never said it so I could pretend it wasn’t true

I love you

And seeing you now makes me wish I didn’t

Because that would hurt so much less

I wish

More than anything

In this moment

That I hated you

Because wishing for anything else feels like a betrayal

 

And I know if you were alive I wouldn’t say it anyway

 

 

           

**Author's Note:**

> "Your Deep Rest" by The Hotelier


End file.
